Flying Colors!

Here’s the short and sweet version (in case you don’t want to read the preachy, religious stuff):  I had another cancer test last week and passed with flying colors. 😊

Yes, God is good and has answered many prayers on my behalf.  Quite honestly, the oncologist this time around was much more enthusiastic than usual about my results.  He reiterated how rare it is that someone with my level of cancer (stage 4, metastasized to the liver and lungs) would be cancer free for two years.  Now I suppose that could be taken two ways:  1) whoa – you’ve made it for two years so it’s overdue to come back any day now, or 2) wow – it’s been two years so your chances keep improving.  I don’t think I’ve articulated those well, but the oncologist seemed to be trying to communicate that #2 was his intent.

And now for the other big thing in my life right now.  My depression is still very much affecting my life.  I am still unemployed and find myself feeling quite low much of the time.  Also, of course, our finances are in pretty rough shape as a result.  The employment market in Calgary for my skills does not seem to have recovered as much as expected yet.  Pretty much everything I’m looking at pays at least 20% less than my last several jobs/contracts (really, below anything I’ve done in Canada since the 90s).  The extreme lack of motivation, that “down” or “sad” feeling, the irrational anxiety, the extreme tiredness (e.g. any activity with other people that lasts for two hours or more is just exhausting) persist.  However, the good news is that, as of approximately two weeks ago, the despair (that lack of hope or lack of light) component of the depression seems to have lifted somewhat.  That really does make my situation much easier to handle.  So, once again, praise the Lord!

I have toyed with the idea of trying to share some more of the things I’ve been learning through this process (about myself, God, etc. – there has been a lot!), but I’m not really sure how.  For one thing, I don’t think this is the right forum.  For another thing, writing it all down is a HUGE effort for me, so it likely won’t happen.  Still, if this is something that might interest you, encourage me and maybe it will happen.  😊